You should make more mistakes
I’ll be the first to admit:
I’m afraid of making mistakes.
Choosing the wrong path, saying the wrong words, presenting myself in the wrong way, failing at a project, or even doing something that doesn’t align with what I “should” be doing.
This fear of failure holds so many people back – myself included.
Some days, the path is clear and my train of thought is in perfect alignment with the goals I’ve set for myself.
Getting work done is easy and the motivation to create flows flawlessly.
Other times, it’s a full-day struggle just to put a few words down on a document. Nothing seems to work well and I second guess everything I’m doing.
Rather than letting these “off days” determine my destiny, I’m learning to show my true colors and make more mistakes.
Here’s my attempt at doing that.
Overcoming the Expectation to Create
We learn wisdom from failure much more than from success; we often discover what will do, by finding out what will not do; and probably he who never made a mistake never made a discovery. –Samuel Smiles
Making big (and small) decisions is usually difficult for me. Typically, this is a way for me to avoid choosing the “wrong thing” and having to live with it.
Although I’ve learned and read about the negative effects of “decision fatigue,” it’s still something that I deal with on a daily basis.
Writing this newsletter this week has proven to be a real challenge. Why?
I couldn’t decide on a topic that resonated with me in the moment.
I felt like I wouldn’t be able to write something “good enough.”
I was afraid it wouldn’t compare to my previous essays.
And instead of acting like it’s all good and gravy all the time – I think it’s important to show that everyone finds it difficult to create sometimes.
I am no exception.
After getting back from an amazing trip to Hawaii with my wife a few days ago, I had plans to write a quick newsletter on Friday and get it published on Saturday.
But, come to find out, an overnight flight + 4-hour time difference doesn’t always welcome you back home in the most tender, loving way.
Yesterday I sat on the couch most of the day wondering why no inspiration was hitting me for a writing session. I wanted so badly to write and create something to share – but I just couldn’t do it.
I went for my usual walks outside, tried to give myself some time to think in silence, and still.. nothing came to mind.
Rather than “force” myself to create something that would inevitably be average at best, I decided to give myself some time to rest and get back at it tomorrow.
So here I am – writing on the couch at 6:30am on a Sunday morning.
If You Can’t Create, Wait
If creating feels difficult for you on any given day – I’d encourage you to investigate the “why.”
A few common reasons this happens to me:
- I need rest
- I need sleep
- I need solitude
- I need exercise & fresh air
- I need ideas (from reading, etc)
Instead of moping around feeling sorry for yourself (definitely not what I was doing most of the day yesterday…), practice determining the reasoning behind your creative block and be intentional about overcoming it.
After getting home from vacation, I’ve been lacking sleep and exercise. I didn’t feel like getting my heart pumping because I knew I needed more sleep – but that’s exactly what would have helped.
When I take the time to understand why I’m feeling a certain way, it makes it that much easier to get back on track with my goals.
Today, I am making it a priority to get outside for a mountain bike ride. I’ve gotten plenty of “rest” and therefore I need to balance it with the feel-good chemicals of outdoor adventure.
If there’s anything I’ve learned to cope with lacking creativity:
If the ideas aren’t flowing, increase the actual blood flow in your body.
Start Small & Be Honest With Yourself
Small successes compound into larger successes.
If you can begin your day with the smallest possible win, start there.
Make your bed.
Tidy your office.
Give yourself space.
Start with something small and achievable and making the next move will be much easier.
The problem on most days is that I set too high of expectations for myself.
“Write & send newsletter” is a big ask of myself.
Instead, this task should be broken down into:
- Decide on newsletter topic
- Write outline for newsletter framework
- 60-minute writing session
- Break + walk
- Another 30-minute writing session…
And the process continues.
If you’re prone to setting lofty to-do tasks for any given day, give yourself some grace and break that task into smaller manageable tasks first.
You’ll find it easier to begin your work, and will find more satisfaction in checking the small boxes to compound your successes.
Takeaways For You
Some days, creating is going to be difficult.
That’s the harsh truth that every person is going to deal with the remainder of their lives.
Rather than expecting some creative miracle to happen:
- Investigate the “why” behind your creative block
- Give yourself time
- Start small
If you can learn “what” you need to do in order to overcome these challenges, you’ll be more consistent in your creative work.
Start with the smallest possible step, and let it compound into tackling your greatest challenges.
Creating something meaningful is always difficult – but always worth it.
Keep going.
–Eric Pfohl